Welcome to our page for supporting family and friends of those who are grieving. We have spoken to the bereaved for their guidance on what did and didn't help after the death of their loved one.
Relatives and friends often feel afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing at such a difficult time, but the simple act of being there is never more important at this time to ensure they feel loved and supported on their difficult journey ahead.
Please click on image below for do’s and don’ts advice on supporting your family and friends following a bereavement
This is our most popular post on Facebook. This advice may help you to support your friends and family
SOME USEFUL ARTICLES TO GUIDE AND ADVISE YOU ON WHAT TO SAY, AND WHAT NOT TO SAY WHEN SUPPORTING A BEREAVED FAMILY MEMBER OR FRIEND
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24 HOUR SUPPORT LINES
|Samaritans||116 123 (UK)||For anyone at anytime for any reason|
|Childline||0800 1111||Support for under 25yrs and their relatives|
|Silverline||0800 470 8090||Support for the over 50's|
DAY/EVENING SUPPORT LINES
|Cruse||0808 808 1677||Nationwide bereavement support|
|Child Bereavement UK||0800 02 88840||Helpline (9 - 5pm)|
|Child Death Helpline||0800 282 986|
0808 800 6019
|Every evening 7-10pm|
Mon/Thurs/Fri - 10am - 1pm
Tues/Wed - 10am - 4pm
|Grief Talk||0808 802 0111||Support for anyone to Grieftalk from any phone for free|
Monday to Friday 9am - 9pm
Have a 1-2-1 CHAT live session with a Grieftalk counsellor
|Bereavement Advice Centre||0800 634 9494||Practical advice (9 - 5pm)|
|Bereavement Trust||0800 435 455||Emotional and practical advice (6 - 10pm)|
|Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide||0300 111 5065||9am-9pm every day|
|Breathing space Scotland Helpline for when it becomes difficult to cope||0800 838587|
Monday to Thursday - 6pm - 2am
Friday 6pm - 6am
|The Compassionate Friends||0345 123 2304|
Open every day 10 am – 4 pm, 7-10 pm
Find local support
Some quotes that may help
Not That Kind of Love
A year after the death of his beloved sister, Wise talks about caring for Clare in her last days, and the blog, now a book, they wrote together
Love Will Never Die: Helping children through bereavement
Clare Shaw- Using direct but child-friendly language, it addresses the mixed emotions felt by a child during times of bereavement and offers support and understanding.
Rowan Williams-This book is hardly a preparation for grief – how could it be. But it is a helpful insight into what grief looks like from inside. That knowledge alone will help you avoid delivering the kind of crass statement, insensitive comment and crushing platitude that – even with the best intention, invariably only makes things worse.
Death, I Miss You (A First Look At)
Pat Thomas- This reassuring picture book explores the difficult issue of death for young children. Children’s feelings and questions about this sensitive subject are looked at in a simple but realistic way.
Badger’s Parting Gift
Susan Varley- Badger is old and knows he will soon die. He tries to prepare his friends and family by giving them lots of wise words, which also helps them deal with their grief when he does die
Are You Sad Little Bear?
Rachel Rivett- a beautifully written little book to help explain the death of a grandparent to young children
Always and Forever
Alan Durant-a book written to explain death to young children delicately and sensitively
Grief Diaries: How to Help the Newly Bereaved
Linda Cheldelin Fell-a guide full of useful tips to answer questions about what to say, what to do, and what not to say to someone facing loss.
Out of the Darkness
Coping With and Recovering From the Death of a Child: Hope, Help, and Healing Resources for Bereaved Parents and Anyone Touched by the Loss of a Child
Beyond Tomorrow- The essential Guide to life after bereavement
Judy Carole Kaufmann-The period following the death of a loved one can be a time of great turmoil. This sensitive book acts as a helpful and supportive road map through the initial period of loss, and through the weeks and months that follow.
See you Soon:A Mother’s Story of Drugs, Grief and Hope
Phillipa Skinner-This book is a honest and reflective account of a mother’s story as she faces up to and lives through her son’s death from a heroin overdose in 2007. Skinner is writing for those who are bereaved, those seeking to support people who are, and also, more specifically, for people affected by addiction – whether through a family member, friend or a personal struggle.
Holy Innocents: Grieving for the Death of a Baby
Margaret Sparshott- This book describes the physical and individual development of the newborn; the different stages of bereavement and how they relate to death before, during, and after birth; and ways in which bereaved parents and other members of the family may be supported by friends, and members of the different professions. Special attention is paid to the beliefs of major religions and how they view the spirituality and death of a baby and minister to the bereaved family.
Grief in Young Children- A Handbook for Adults
Atle Dyregov-For years, I have strongly advised adults to read Grief in Children because I believe it is the most sympathetically written and accessible book on the topic. It is the thoughtful distillation of many years’ clinical experience of working with bereaved children and their families
An Empty Chair: Living in the wake of a sibling’s suicide
Sara Swan Miller- too often, the grief and bewilderment of surviving siblings is simply ignored, leaving the bereaved siblings feeling even more abandoned. The accounts of siblings’ experiences in this book are based on interviews with more than thirty people from all over the United States, as well as the author’s own experience of losing a sister to suicide.
History of a Suicide: my sister’s unfinished life
Jill Bialosky-The author presents an account of her sister’s suicide, and the lifelong impact that the suicide has had on her own life and the lives of the other members of her family.
Tips from widows
Jan Robinson-It is like a crib sheet of how to cope; it is as helpful to friends of widows as to the widows themselves, and it is written from experience, which is the bedrock of reliable advice
Peter Speck and Ian Ainsworth Smith- this book holds a central place within the pastoral literature for carers of the dying or bereaved. Since publication of the first edition, research and new multi-professional approaches to care require more than ever that those in ministry develop a good grasp of current understanding and models of grief
Living with Loss and Grief: Letting Go, Moving on (Overcoming Common Problems)
Julia Tugendhat-Grief and loss come in many different forms, from the searing pain when a loved one dies, to the necessary mourning for lost dreams and changed ideals at different life stages. After loss, people cannot be as they were before, but they can adapt to the changed circumstances and go on from there. This book looks at ways of grieving and the factors which help the grieving process.
Death… And How To Survive It: A unique, practical and uplifting guide to coming to terms with the loss of your partner
Kate Boydell-was widowed at the age of 33. She felt that her life had lost its purpose and she wanted it to end. But she got through it – and so can everyone. In this down-to-earth, practical, insightful and often humorous guide, Kate draws on her own experience of bereavement to offer frank advice on coping with every aspect of the grieving process.
Widow to Widow: Thoughtful, Practical Ideas For Rebuilding Your Life
Genevieve Davis Ginsburg- widow, author, and therapist offers fellow widows-as well as their family and friends-sage advice for coping with the loss of a husband
If There’s Anything I Can Do….how to help someone who has been bereaved
Caroline Doughty-a compilation of interviews with people who have lost a partner, what helped and what upset them